Hey guys.
I AM A MARRIED WOMAN NOW!!!!!!
My husband and I tied the knot on January 11, 2019; best day of my life♥♥♥♥♥♥
All I can do now is just continuously praise and thank God for this blessing and new season/chapter of my life.
As much as I would LOVE to just babble about my wedding day and just how excited and in awe I was and still am…. I can’t do that nor do I want to do that. WHY? because the Lord continuously keeps reminding me that this is NOT about me. Yes.. I did get married. Yes… I did marry the love of my life who happens to be an awesome man of God, and yes I am VERY excited about everything that has happened, but I must remain humble and most of all my desire isn’t to share how great I feel, but my desire is to be an example and a source of hope for all woman who are waiting for their kings to come swoop them off of their feet, just as mine did for me. I also just want to encourage all to believe and to know that God is just so real and that he hears your prayers, cries and concerns. He knows your heart and is doing everything in his power to make sure he supplies all of you with all that your heart’s desire.
Today I want to talk about some of the changes I had to make and go through before God made me available for my husband to find me and I also want to touch on some very important things I did while I was waiting on my king. I hope and pray that some of you may even feel fit to adopt some of these for yourself while you’re waiting on your kings to find you; which they will when YOU are in a place to be found.
The Healing Process
Ladies! I can’t stress this enough. If you’re still broken, hurting, or just holding on to your past hardships/broken hearts/bad relationships-frienships, un-forgiveness, anything; you need to allow the Lord in to heal your hearts. I learned that God will not send you what you’re asking for until he feels you’re ready for it. #GodsTiming
In January of 2017, I was praying for God to send me my husband and let me tell you!! I was nowhere near ready for a man to step into my life at that time and God knew that. I had just gotten out of a bad relationship 6 months before then, and I was still holding onto the hurt I had endured while being in that relationship. Around that time, I only wanted a “Husband” because I was tired of being lonely and feeling like I had no one to love me; being single at the time and on social media, seeing all the couples also played a huge role on why I started praying for a soul mate as well. I was still looking for a man to fill the void that only God could fill, and that’s where the problem stemmed. A lot of the times, we look for other things, activities, and people to fill holes in our lives that only God is supposed to fill.
“Man can’t give you the love that God can.” Terran Brodie
When God made that clear to me, I then knew that I needed to change my perspective of why I desired to have my husband and also had to change my perspective on what I was looking for in my soul mate. I had to delete the thoughts of him completing me and making me whole and I had to allow GOD to fill me up with his everlasting company and love. I had to become whole in God first and I had to allow God to completely remake me; change my entire identity. #Surrender “All of you God and NONE of me”. God didn’t make the man to complete us as woman, but he made us woman to complete the man. Remember, God took the man’s rib and formed us out of their rib. That was when the MAN became incomplete (without his rib) and we were then made whole. (Genesis 2:18-25) So just imagine how the single men of God are feeling, without having their rib with them. (Get right for your man ladies) 9 times out of 10 if your man’s life doesn’t align with the word of God, God didn’t send him to you. The word says “He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord“ Proverbs 18:22 NIV, and with my understanding and belief, I truly believe that’s why we are to wait for the man to find us because he knows exactly who and what he’s looking for; He know’s his rib, but before the man finds the woman she must be the GOOD thing; grounded in the Lord, seeking Gods face, believing God for what she’s praying for, and trying to live a life pleasing unto the Lord. If you’re not the woman God described to your God-fearing man, how is he going to be able to spot you out? How is he going to be able to sweep you off of your feet? I had to change my ways as well. I had to start living a life more pleasing unto God. I had to let go of the sin. God had to deliver me from fornication before marriage(being un-pure), cursing, getting drunk/drinking, smoking, and just being in environments my spirit was uncomfortable in.
“You can’t expect to be found by your God-fearing man when you’re in someone else’s radar.” Terran Brodie
I learned that! I was constantly questioning God, and asking God why the men that were trying to pursue me weren’t of him and he dealt with me on that something serious. The men were either half believers, or didn’t believe at all. He straight up told me to look at myself. You are what you attract. Simple. I was immature, childish, hurt, bitter, angry, and just lost. (I had to change!!) I was also holding onto so much negative feelings and emotions. I just had to let go. If you want your king sis, You MUST change your ways, let go of the old, forgive and #BecomeAvailable and if you’ve already changed for the better, continue to wait on the LORD to lead your king right to you. Patience is KEY and in the next part of this blog you’ll learn and read about what I did while I was waiting patiently for my king to walk into my life.
Embrace your single life while you’re waiting.
After God dealt with me, and showed me what I needed to change and do in order to become available for my husband, I immediately acted on it and started to focus on myself. That’s what the waiting process is all about. FOCUSING ON YOURSELF, but keeping your eyes and ears open for God to let you know when your king has arrived. During my waiting process, I did a lot of things to get my mind, heart, and spirit right with God. I started to pray a lot more, started attending church EVERY chance I got. (Sunday services, Bible studies and Friday night services) whenever there was church, I made it my business to be there because I needed God to fill my voids and make me whole. I yearned for God. It’s really good to go to church and receive words of wisdom from your pastors and other fellow believers. I started reading my word on my own, started hanging with more saved woman and started walking and talking like one of God’s daughters. I made a vision board of what I desired for the new year and prayed that God would make everything come to pass that was on my vision board, which he did! I started paying off my debt. I just started to walk more righteously before the Lord. I started fasting. I started listening to a lot more worship and gospel music. Cleansing my mind and heart of ALL things of this world. I went on dates by myself, pampered myself, and just made sure I spent time with myself. (That’s very important) — Get to know yourself! Love yourself! EMBRACE YOUR SINGLE LIFE! Love being alone, and get comfortable with being by yourself. Find some new hobbies to partake in. Be OKAY with being by yourself, that’s when you’ll know you’re whole and ready for your king because remember, he’s not there to complete you, but to compliment you♥ Don’t focus on your king finding you and don’t think that every guy who tries to pursue you is the one for you either. I made that mistake lol and it wasn’t pleasant.
I actually started reading books that also helped me grow as a woman and that also spoke to the struggles that I had. I read The Wait by Devon Franklin and Meagan Good.(Great book for your walk with celibacy) I read The Uninvited by Lisa Terkeurst. (Great book for defeating battles of feeling alone, by yourself, and less than.. Not wanted… I truly recommend this book for the women who are dealing with insecurities. This book truly helped free me from many of my insecurities) I read Closed Legs do Get Fed by D. Danyelle. (A great book for those who are pursuing their walk of celibacy. This book also reminds us woman the importance of waiting to open our legs and just speaks against all of the worlds sayings of our cookie getting us what we want) You are still a queen and will get the respect you desire if you choose to keep your legs closed. The right man will come and respect you and your boundaries. I read The Single Woman by Mandy Hale. (Great book for single woman lol, the title speaks for itself. It’ll help you appreciate the woman you are and teach you how to embrace your singleness, how to love yourself, and just how to be the woman you want a man to find.) I read Every Young Woman’s battle– guarding your mind, heart, and body in a sex-saturated world by Shannon Ethridge and Stephen Arterburn. (Great book that helps us woman learn how to guard ourselves from sexual immorality.) I recommend each and every one of these books. It wasn’t until I changed my life over for the good that I found out that I had a passion to read. — Just a fun fact about me.
But, there’s one thing that I did that I feel like brought my husband straight into my life. I started to pray for my husband when I didn’t even know of his existence. I started speaking him into my life. There’s this book called 31 Prayers for my Future Husband by Jennifer and Aaron Smith; I recommend that ALL single woman who are waiting for their kings to walk into their life, purchase this book and allow the prayers to manifest your husbands into your life because I swear that’s what it did for me. I wrote in that journal whenever the Lord led me too, and the day before my wedding I finished writing in it. I was able to give it to my husband as one of his marriage gifts from me; he’s been reading and has been telling me that it’s just amazing how I was praying for him (not knowingly) before I even knew he would be my husband. The very important and last thing you must do while waiting for your husband though is have FAITH. “For we walk by faith, not by sight.” 2 Corinthians 5:7 NKJV Have faith and believe that the man you’re praying for is the man who God is going to bless you with. Have faith that God hears your prayers and that he will give you the desires of your heart. Believe in God and put ALL of your trust in him and he won’t disappoint you. Sit pretty QUEEN and allow your king to find you and if you’re available to be found he will HAVE to consult and go through GOD in order to get to your heart!
He’s looking for his good thing; which is YOU! ♥♥♥♥♥
I prayed for a man who loved God and who believed in the power of prayer and that’s what the Lord blessed me with. Here’s a video of my Husband and I, 2 hours before our wedding ceremony praying. He came to the hotel room, surprised me and asked to pray before the ceremony. God is just so amazing!!! If he can do it for me, he definitely will do it for you!!!!!!!!!! Just have faith and believe, even when things just don’t seem like they’re ever going to get better or visible. BELIEVE!!! Even when you begin to doubt and feel like your King is never going to come…. BELIEVE!!!! Your king is coming. ♥
Thank you all for reading and watching. Please feel free to leave any comments, thoughts, feelings, opinions, anything you may have to say to me. I would love for my readers to engage and please share with your friends.
Thank you once again.
Terran Zhane♥
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